Tuesday, February 28, 2012

When will motherhood happen?

Kevin and I struggled for 3 years to have a child of our own. So far, life was simple, easy, straightforward. We did what we wanted to do, and aside from our jobs, we slept when we wanted, went to social events on a whim, blew money on things we would both find silly now. I look back at those days, and I totally get it. We would need those three years to grow stronger as a couple for life's challenges ahead.  Boy, how life changes, and QUICKLY!

We started trying to have a child, and every month, I was hopeful. I charted, planned,
calculated, took temps,  tried eating "fertility foods", followed old wives tales about standing on my head... you name it. Eventually, we sought the help of a fertility doc. Kevin did his little test in a dark room with a cup... I still think he got the easy test... I had my uterus filled with iodine via a small tube and had x rays taken to see if my ovaries were closed off. The test was quite uncomfortable, even though I had been given a good sedative. Test results would say that there was nothing clinically wrong with us. My tubes were clear and Kevin's test came out "better than normal" haha!
 Here is was, early October 2008, and after the test results, we made a decision to begin the In-vetro fertilization route. I had an appointment to begin hormone injections in line with my body's normal cycle in Mid November. This is when my son made his presence known.
I had been battling with quitting smoking, because I knew that was the last piece of the puzzle when looking at my infertility. I finally gave in after 3 weeks of being smoke free and lit up in the front of our house. I called it my "farewell to freedom" ciggie. I took two puffs and got sick, horribly sick. I remember my mom saying something to me as she was a smoker... except when she was pregnant. She said she couldn't. I totally got that feeling that very moment. I wondered...well, I am supposed to "start" on Saturday, but they can test earlier than that now... why not...
I had a digital test still left over from previous testing events, and even though it was a middle of the evening test, well, see the results below...  it was from then on, I should have known that nothing would have gone as planned. That appointment... well, I tested on a Friday night after 5, and that appointment was set for Monday morning at 9 am... no real way to cancel it! I called anyways at 8 am nervous as nervous could be, and simply told them what I had found out.  They told me to come in anyway, and they could fast track a blood test and we would have confirmation within 20 minutes... sure enough... There he was! My sweet Cameron-Bear!